Foodie

What is with some women and their “E’s”?

This one isn’t a mother—she is a mommy.

That one doesn’t have a spouse or a husband—she has a hubby.

Recipes are yummy. That fine actor in TV is a hottie. We want to eat enough veggies.

It makes me rather scream-y.

I realize that E is the most common letter in the alphabet, but can we please do away with the cutesy dialect? Why on Earth is it necessary for women to talk like Betty Boop? Why is this a good thing? If our men piped up with these affectations, we’d be appalled. At what point do we stop talking like sixth graders and start speaking like adults?

Just a few minutes after I began these musings, I sat down in the living room to read a cookbook to find some quick recipes. I have watched Rachael Ray once or twice while visiting someone in the hospital, but she, quite frankly, is too energetic for me. If I bounced around in the kitchen like that, with the flames and hot liquids and sharp objects, I would end up back at that hospital, this time in the ER.

However, the woman is nothing if not coordinated, and she can cook, and I do appreciate her efforts to make food prep accessible to all of us. Unfortunately, it took me a while to determine what EVOO was…some newfangled substance? By-products of the emu? I started cooking at age seven, and even though I don’t live in a metro area, we do have supermarkets here, and I had never encountered EVOO.

As it turns out, I had, just not with that nickname.

And then…and then…I reached the section on “stoups.” Now bear in mind, I cut my cooking show teeth on Julia Child and her French verbiage, but this one was new to me.

When I hit the chapter where we were making “sammies,” I realized I was somewhere along the line destined to fight a losing battle. However, until I run out of strength, this non-foodie mommy will not be eating yummy sammies and veggies with her hottie hubby.