Christmas letters

My dear friend Toby suggested that we write Christmas letters and include the story of Rocky as the night visitor.

This led me to reminisce about those form letters which we have received in the past.

My one neighbor, Mrs. Gladys Kravitz, always sent those we-are-so-fabulous-I-bet-you-wish-you-were-us newsletters to my mother, who lived next door. It made me want to gag.

I was always so tempted to send out our own version.

Dear Friends,

Merry Christmas! Yet another year has passed, this one more eventful than the last.

This year, Kiki struggled in math. She has gone to tutoring and has brought her grade from a 40% to a 42%! We are so proud of her, and it cost us only three thousand dollars. The doctor finally has diagnosed her with attention deficit disorder, and we are hoping that is the reason for all those outbursts which we have formerly attributed to hormones.

Rocky is doing so much better; we are so very proud of him. We have been to the police station only one time this year, and the police have been here only once--and this time, he didn't use the siren. Plus, he has been banned from only one store this year, and it is one which we don't frequent anyway. Rocky has been chosen for a special group in school, and he gets to go to a math class with three other boys. Not only that, he has been singled out for reading and is in a class by himself. Plus, his teacher has chosen him to sit with his desk right against hers, and the lunch room ladies allow him to have his own table and sometimes even sit with the girls! He has joined boy scouts, and the leaders like him so well they have chosen him to sit next to them at every meeting! This kid is truly loved.

This year has been great for Nita, too. Hers was the first name learned by her teacher, and the teacher has our phone number on speed dial on her cell phone. I feel so blessed--we are so popular!

My true Christmas blessing is that Mrs. Kravitz doesn't like us and doesn't send us those letters. Perhaps she is afraid of what she might get in return.

Happy holidays to all, and may peace prevail in your homes.