Tuesday, January 8, 2008

OoooOOOOooo---Beware of the Roo-OOOM-ba

I have been giving serious consideration to one of those cute little robot vacuums. I would love to go to bed and wake up to a freshly vacuumed home. I would love even more to find that the floors were cleaned, dishes washed, laundry folded, and Tom Selleck was standing over me with a cup of freshly brewed Arabica.

If only.

Anyway, I have some hesitation about robot vacuums. First, we have three dogs who might decide that the vacuum was no longer something to be feared, but was some form of prey that must be destroyed. Two hundred dollars is a little steep to be paying for a dog toy. Next thing, they'll be wanting their own car.

Second, these dogs shed. A lot. I know only too well how never-ending it is to clean up their hair. Some days, we could knit a new dog with what we sweep up. I don’t know the work ethic held by these little robots, but I can imagine that the vacuum might become overwhelmed and simply shut down--heaven knows I have done the same thing at times. Or the cute little robot vacuum, feeling overwhelmed in its artificial intelligence way, most likely would escape one night and run away to a new home with more reasonable expectations. Again, I can relate.

Third, when I was a kid, I saw lots of those B horror films on late night television. Somehow, in the back of my mind, I envision the vacuum taking on a life of its own, veering off its programmed path and searching me out, latching onto my sleeping form…

Not an end I would have chosen. Maybe I’ll stay with the vacuum—other than sucking up a sock or two, it has never given me too much trouble, and the dogs are afraid of it. So far.

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